:|

Its like one of the most cliched dialog, something which if i have not heard then at least experienced many a times but it rattled me off like anything today. May be it was just an aberration after coming to K or maybe its been long since I ventured out to play with guys.

A comment by one asshole in a badminton match "ladki hai... dont play hard" shook me so badly, i just could not take it lightly and shrug it off. It is not new, it is not an out of the world experience, its just that it irritated me so badly, I am no badminton player, but at least they let could me loose with dignity.

Anyways, maybe i just need to learn to handle this coz the Indian MCP has a long way to go before he evolves into something more tolerable.

huh.. I hate when i sound like a man hating feminist :|

:|>>>>

"Once again a hotch potch post written in a high state of agitation and disturbance. I am just so confused about arranged marriages (ya, I know confusion is my default state, but still). Apart from the usual blah blah of not knowing the person well enough in arranged marriages etc etc, they just do not feel right, I just don’t feel good about going in for an arranged marriage coz I feel it violates the individual in me, Its like that, the environment becoming stronger than the individuals and people dissolving in their surroundings. I pisses me off that the guy whom I might marry will not know a thousand things about me before committing himself to me, and even after marriage he wont know atleast 200 that shape me, I might hide them perpetually. He will be married more to my environment and everything vice versa. This feeling of something not being right is much more stronger for me than the scare I feel about marriage itself. Ya Ya I know that I can actually know him well before actually getting married, but will both of us be that forthright, that truthful about ourself? I know I’ll act good, I know I’ll show that I am a better person than I actually am.Actually putting it in a very B-schoolish style, there are 3 things that should click in a person for marriage : 1. It’s the person he truly is, his thoughts, you know, the connection that two people develop because of their intrinsic natures. 2. The wrapper characteristics : Looks, family, income, etc etc 3. The meanest, scariest, the society. In a love marriage the first one has the highest importance, with the other two following in the order, while the sequence reverses in an arranged marriage. I hate the society having the most importance, I don’t want to live for the so called society, ewweeee, Its wrong, Its collective will crushing an individual., And I know I suddenly sound like Ayn Rand, but Its just not acceptable, it questions my individuality. Lot more to crib about, but later. Should I change my blog name to the crib-o-junction, I think that will suit it more…. " written sometime in mid may

Its July, a lot has changed, some of my perceptions about arranged marriages have changed too. They are like taking  a lottery on life, you might hit a jackpot or make a jack ass of yourself for forever. But the order remains - society, wrapper and then individual. And the expectations are huge... and whatever the modern indian male pretend to be, he hasn't changed, he is still his mamma's boy.

music or scream??

This is a post written without any kind of background or reality check, its just what i feel and assume, probably i am being overly sentimental here or its a purely sadistic view point to see sadness and pain, whatever it is, i don't know, i am confused  [:) this smiley is for one person who might stumble here in a few days]

Hmm, so let me not take so much footage, actually teh issue is about the live music concept in restaurants and hotels and now becoming the style and class statement in malls also.

First, I think there has to be a culture to appreciate live music, which comes not just by having those musicians singing in your restuarants. The patrons/guests should be receptive and responsive to this. Live music as an intrinsic part and element in the place can be quite attractive, but the same being played as a background score just does not justify having it. 

It pains to see those people singing song after song, plying tune after tune to which no one is paying attention...I feel ashamed in their presence, i just dont understand why as it other people's self absorbed behavior is my fault, anyways, its not that i do anything. 

I feel that the people who are playing/singing were most probably aspiring singers who had dreamt of being someone successful in the field of music, but probably they were not able to, and now they are forced to use their art, their passion and display it to people who just dont care. We are not concerned if its some one singing continuously for 3-4 hours or is its a music player. Not only their dreams were not realised but they are forced to live with the realisation of this everyday.

Whenever i see any such performer, he somehow seems no-so-happy to me, maybe its my perception, or maybe they are genuinely not very happy, I cant say. Anyways, i sincerely hope that it is not so sad and there is a better story behind it. 

random thoughts.

This is my 50th blog here, yippppeeee, yeyyy, ok ok, i am not keeping counts or expecting to celebrate my blog's golden jubilee like i celebrated my silver one...

I wanted to write about so many things, so this will be a hotch potch post, with random references to random events of my life, so kindly bear with me.

1. Its absolutely pathetic to travel by public transport in Delhi, and for that matter the entire UP too. First, no one is ready to leave the ladies reserved seats, the conductor is not at all concerned about these issues and complaining does not help, the system is a little stupid with ladies seat on one side of the aisle instead of all at the front which is more sensible thing to do.

I fought with a lawyer who refused to leave seat for a pregnant lady, who was standing for about an hr. :

2. The election election and caste your vote which everyone keep shouting is such nonsense. I think that at least 20% of young, working population of india is not even living in the places where they have been issued voter ID cards. How the hell are we supposed to go and vote?

An online or distant voting system would bring in more results than spending money on loads of advertising and awareness programs.

3. The rickshaw waalas charge almost as much as a taxi in Gurgaon.

4. Half of the people i interact with have lost contact with the normal real life. We are the breed that spends 24 hrs in ac, have dinners parties/blow up thousands for a single dinner, shop in exorbitantly priced malls, and haggle with the rickshaw waalas for 5rs.

5. In life it actually does not matter from where you started, where you are going and how you are traveling is more important. This is for the very helpful person i met today and which made my day.

6. Sometimes i have loads to write and i am almost bursting with thoughts, but wen i actually start to type, i feel blank.

7. Arranged marriage is one fucking, pain in the ass thing to go through. The losers who were not even capable of getting a girl friend suddenly have more attitude, taste class and demands than Hritik Roshan.

8. Love is a very weak emotion, it cannot survive by itself. its a creeeper which needs the support of emotions like courage, faith and confidence.

And yes, the ego has to go, like a great person said "mutual surrender of ego".

9. I thought of writing something light, but lots of cribbing these days. :

10. Am totally bored. Wanna go back to K.

Cheers to Cheer Leaders

"Amar singh is giving a speech in the forgotton small town Rampur"...tell me how many people will go and attend it voluntarily. Now say "Amitabh Bachchan is coming to Rampur in a speech by Amar Singh" Now imagine the scene at the grounds.

A small movie is being produced with an unknown sexy heroine and equally unknown and not-at-all handsome hero....total flop material, but it has a item number with Mallika Sherawat...the producer is at least assured of getting his money back.

As a country we accept all this, we are quite comfortable with a hero attending political meeting to gather crowd, which is a matter of importance for the country, we are comfortable with nudity (in a cheap movie, in a song, at least to some extent to satisfy the masses) but we snigger at the cheer-leaders in the cricket matches.

The young, hep modern crowd of India is also so hypocritical. People enjoy looking at them, but never refrain from criticizing the concept of having them on cricket grounds. Hey, they are just like you, people who went in there to cheer their team, just that their way is professional and they get paid for it

Is the reason for us not respecting them the fact that they represent a concept completely foreign to India? We have enough examples of doing/aping the west but not accepting it, or accepting it in a manner of guilty pleasure. 

They are just cheering the team they stand for, cheer leading requires hell lot of work, practice and discipline on the part of those girls. We don't respect their art, rather we never look at it as an art, all we see is the scantily clad girls. We have a long way to go before we can see and perceive the real issue rather than grapple with insignificant details, and this applies to things ranging from cheerleading to moral-policing to Ram-temple in our society. 

The media ridicules them, people crack dirty jokes on them on national television, the radio-broadcasters make snide remarks at those girls and the whole country laughs. again the role of media and public morality comes to question.

I have absolutely no idea about the life those girls have, if its comfortable, if they are being treated respectfully or not, but it requires courage and hard work to do this work and I am very ashamed that my country is treating them this way. 

Whats up??

I am not someone who keeps up with all current affairs all the time, but whenever I happen to switch on a news channel or glance through a news paper, all I can see is violence, major part of which is directed against women or children. Especially in the past few days, most of the headlines comprised of these incidents only, reading about the killings in Nithari, or of those in Punjab, then yesterday, heard about Rape cases in the Madarsas in Allahabad, I almost feel pity for the society. These incidents, which cannot be tolerated in any civilized society, are happening in India, which regards children as messenger of God and Women as Goddesses themselves,is so sad.
Is the world we are living in all unreal, this is all a virtual world we are living in, the real India is that we hear about in the news, shudder at its grotesqueness and then forget about it thinking that its another world, another age.
And then there is this helplessness of not being able to do anything to change these circumstances. Whenever I try to consider my options, I am never able to reach any practical, feasible solution to this. What can I do, at the least donate money, at max leave my job and join some organization. But will any of these and all the other options lying between them lead to any change in the present circumstances, will we ever be able to say that the society is now safe for all especially young vulnerable children and defenseless women. And most important is how can we help??

Punishment-to whom?

Sanjay Dutt has again asked for bail and his bail has been extended till 6 Feb. Found guilty on 28 Nov, his surrender was postponed till Dec 19, after which it was extended till Jan 18, when he again got an extension and now he has to surrender on Feb 6. Sanjay was found guilty for possessing a 9mm pistol and an AK-56 rifle. He applied for bail stating that he was the only earning member and wanted to make arrangements for his daughter’s education. Has anyone ever heard of such excuses for bail petitions? And the amazing fact is that he has been granted bail. Though he was sentenced almost 2 months back, he has not been convicted till now. How can we then call our system fair??
No one is raising voice against this outright mockery of law.

When we look at the problem like this, we realize that the system is not fair, but maybe there can be a different solution to the problem.

There are people who commit crimes under pressure, first time offenders, people who have been forced to do those crimes under unavoidable circumstances, for excitement. These people who are not basically criminals but have done some wrong deeds due to misguidance or circumstances should be given a chance for a better life. Condition in jails is horrible and the environment they provide is far from conducive to the betterment of people. People come out of jails hardened and bitter. Convicts are generally left unproductive, as their talent and skills are all wasted and they usually work as unskilled or semi-skilled laborers. Why should the state feed the people who have been convicted and why should their families be left to fend for themselves?? The real punishment is given to the accused families who have to look after themselves

One thing that I would like to say is that I am NOT defending those criminals for whom crimes are a way of life, who are not sorry for what they have done or those whose mentality justifies the crimes that they have committed.

If these conditions have to continue, then maybe it is better not to convict them at all. Why is there no probation system in India, one in which people who commit such crimes can be put in probation houses where they are free to go out in the day, earn for themselves and their families, lead a fairly normal life, but report back to the place in the evening; and then if they commit the crime again, then maybe they can be put through a difficult punishment. In the end, the purpose is to make people realize their mistakes and make them better human beings.

Even in Dutt’s case, he was not fully aware of the consequences or the severity of his actions. Sanjay has already served 18 months in jail and its highly unlikely that he will repeat his acts again, and considering the fact that so much money is invested in his films, maybe he could also be left out on probation, but of course heavy fine should be imposed on him. That way the state can get funds to put in better causes, and Sanjay will also not be rendered unproductive.

Indian Scenario

Got this forward today....

OLD VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

MODERN VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house. Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter. Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper. The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance). Opposition MP's stage a walkout.Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.

Arjun Singh makes Special Reservation for Grass Hopper in educational Institutions & in Govt Services.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice". Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'. CPM calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden' Koffi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

Many years later...The ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi billion dollar company in silicon valley.100s of grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in India...



ps: Deepa Meheta's Water got nominated for Oscars as an entry from Canada. Sounds familiar to the above one no?? And now the news-channel are saying how proud India is at this achievement. Who gave them the right to claim even a speck of Deepa's effort?

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